Draft Notes to Institutions
Use these sample messages to inform schools, daycares, healthcare providers, or therapists about your family changes calmly and clearly.
Example 1: Notifying School or Daycare of Separation
Subject: Update on Family Situation and Contact Details
Dear [School/Daycare Name],
I am writing to inform you that my family situation has changed. [Child’s Name]’s parents are now separated. Please ensure that I receive all communications regarding [Child’s Name] directly at this email/phone number: [Your contact information].
I request that no information be shared exclusively through the other parent. Please confirm receipt of this message.
Thank you for your support.
Kind regards,
[Your Full Name]
Example 2: Requesting Medical or Therapy Information
Subject: Request for Direct Communication Regarding [Child’s Name]
Dear [Healthcare Provider/Therapist],
I am [Child’s Name]’s [father/mother] and have parental responsibility. Due to recent family changes, I ask that all medical or therapy-related information be sent directly to me at [Your contact information].
Please confirm your receipt of this request.
Thank you,
[Your Full Name]
Family Court Affidavit Starter Notes
This guide helps you organise your key information for court affidavits related to family violence and custody. Use bullet points and keep it factual.
Personal Details
- Your full name, date of birth, and relationship to the children
- The children’s full names and dates of birth
Summary of Family Violence
- Dates and brief descriptions of incidents (keep it objective, use the Blueprint if needed)
- Impact on you and the children
- Any police reports or intervention orders in place
Parenting History
- Custody and care arrangements before separation
- Any changes since separation
Concerns for Children’s Welfare
- Specific behaviours or incidents affecting children
- Observations of children’s emotional or physical health
Your Role and Plans
- How you have supported the children
- Your parenting goals and proposed arrangements
BIFF Response Examples
Use these calm, clear responses to disengage from conflict while keeping the conversation focused and factual.
Scenario: Receiving a Provocative Text
- Aggressive message:
“You never do your job as a dad. You’re useless, and I’m sick of it.” - BIFF Response:
“I’m focused on doing my best for the kids. Let’s keep our conversations about their wellbeing.”
Scenario: Being Blamed for Missed Appointments
- Blaming message:
“You’re always late and ruining the kids’ schedules.” - BIFF Response:
“I understand the importance of punctuality. I’m working on improving this for the kids’ sake.”
Incident Log Template
Track incidents with this simple form — use for your own records or to share with professionals if needed.
- Date
- DD-MM-YYYY
- Time
- HH:MM
- Incident Description
- Brief, factual summary of what happened
- People Involved
- Names of witnesses
- Location
- Where it happened
- Emotional Impact/Notes
- How it affected you and/or children